Stay Strong

This post was supposed to go up in March to go along with my March theme of Stay Strong. However, I was feeling uninspired and unmotivated. Those feelings permeated pretty much all aspects of my life.  I wasn’t running.  I wasn’t doing strength. I wasn’t eating very well. I wasn’t getting things done that needed done for my business.  During all of this I kept asking myself what was going on with me? Why am I so incredibly unmotivated and just didn’t even care? I had this great theme for the month, and I wasn’t living up to it at all.

I have some ideas on why this happened—lack of sunshine and Vitamin D catching up with me. Stressors that I was struggling to gain control of that were just out of reach most of the time. Knowing those reasons helps me know what to avoid and what to do in the future. The fact still remained, however, that I had to pull myself out of where I currently was. And where I currently was sucked.

During this reflection I came to realize the many things that I actually had accomplished and how I kept our home and family running even when things were hard. I had let excuses win some of the time.  Many times I got up and got it done—whatever “it” was. All of those stressors and barriers that I was waking up in the night thinking about—I got over, under, around and through all of them. Sucesses like that only happen by being dedicated and getting creative.

I don’t think I realized until the last few days of the month how my theme was playing out.  I didn’t feel strong when I was not running, stressing over grocery bills, and feeling guilty about 300 things. I felt like I was clinging onto an edge and hanging halfway off. Everyday I took care of my family. Everyday I hauled myself up over that edge and did what needed done. Some things I think I did while hanging halfway off that edge as many moms do. I Stayed Strong. I kept hanging on. I kept pulling myself back up.

One of my jobs involves going into schools and presenting a program on Child Assault Prevention.  We tell the kids that in addition to the many rights they have, they also have the right to be Safe, Strong, and Free.  We talk about what each of these words mean and talk about how kids can feel strong. Inner strength. Courage. Confident. I need all of those right now and they are also hanging off that edge with me. But you know what? None of us are falling off. We are strong enough to hang on.

I believe that is where Strength lies—in not falling off when things get hard. Hanging on, maybe slipping, maybe sliding down, but pulling yourself back up no matter how slow it goes or how long it takes. We all have this Strength inside us and it shows in different ways. There is always a way back up. Someone could give us a boost up or a step stool.  We might even need a whole ladder. We might start to see the value in what we are doing and make ourselves a rope to pull ourselves up. Maybe something happens that pushes us so far down and we are swinging from that edge about to blow off and we find the strength of 10 Grinches plus two and jump back up and make some dramatic leaps forward.

Don’t let anyone tell you that you aren’t Strong enough. One of the first steps to recognizing your strength is to start appreciating what you have and what you can do no matter how small it is. Write it down. Make a list. What did it take to do those things? To accomplish those tasks or get what you have? Write down ALL of what it took to get there. There is nothing too small. Pile up all those small things under you and let it lift you higher and higher. Once you start noticing everything you have done, it gives you the confidence to go a little further. You don’t have to take giant steps. Small steps are fine.  Strength is facing what is in front of you and trying even when you aren’t sure of the outcome. Even when you are scared. We are never getting stronger without first being scared, nervous, unsure.

So Stay Strong. Keep noticing the small things and saying, “Hell yes! I did that!” Small things over and over add up to big things. Keep hanging onto that Edge.

Peace from The Edge,

Julia