It’s been a bit since I’ve posted on here. During the past 6 weeks, I’ve been navigating state football playoffs with a Varsity cheerleader, holidays, physical therapy, work, and having what I’m calling an “existential crisis.” I think we all have these from time to time when the Universe tells us to just stop, sit down, eat too many Oreo’s and watch Grown Ups because there is too much stuff in your head, and you don’t even know where to start, so just stop. I won’t go into a lot of detail about that (or how many Oreo’s I actually ate), but I will talk about how I am pulling myself out of it.
When I am coaching families, I tell them that they will get some good habits started, make some changes, and then they will hit a bump in the road. They won’t get to the grocery store that week. Someone got sick. Mom or Dad had to work late all week leaving one parent with the kids to get to 13 activities most of which are overlapping by time or kid or both. I tell my families to expect this because things don’t always go smoothly. What matters is how they negotiate it and pull themselves over that bump in the road. This is where the checklist below comes in.
- Acknowledge the situation. It is what it is. You can’t change what happened or pretend that it didn’t happen. Actually, maybe you can a little. I acknowledge that I ate way too many Oreo’s. I am ignoring the actual number because, well, it’s irrelevant and would just make me feel bad. I know that the at least a couple wheels fell off the bus, and it happened, and that’s that.
- Make a choice: Are you going to feel guilty and defeated and decide that you have failed and will never be able to be healthy? Are you going to get back on the tracks, put the wheels back on the buss, and move forward with what you have? Maybe you will do a combination of both-move forward, but feel really guilty about the mess up and blow it up in your mind as a way bigger deal than it is. I recommend against this one.
- If you have decided to put the wheels on the bus and move forward, figure out what you need to do to get back on track. Do you need to go to the grocery store? Get the laundry done? Buy running shoes? Create a schedule? Whatever it is, do that thing so you are prepared.
- Start again. Start over. Just start.
Is this going to be easy? Probably not. Is it going to be worth it? Definitely. Sometimes you have all the tools you need at your disposal, and yet you just can’t get going. You tell yourself all the excuses. You tell yourself you have no excuse. The key to all of this is number four: Just. Start.
Now, how does this pertain to me and my “existential crisis?” I have not been running in the early morning for a long time. I used to be out the door by 5am at least 4 days a week. For the last few years, I’ve found it harder and harder to do this. First is was my daughter’s 6am dance team practices. Then it was a dog waking me up all night because she was used to my Grandma letting her out in the night. (Another story for another time.) Then is was the fact that I just don’t sleep because between both dogs, I am never sleeping for more than a couple hours at a time, and really, I haven’t slept in over 19 years, and I am TIRED. It’s too cold. It’s too windy. It’s too icy. It’s too rainy. Today I laid in bed and listened to the wind outside, knowing that my appropriate-for-the-weather running gear was already set out, and finally got up. Got dressed. Sucked it up. And went outside. I told myself I only had to do 2 miles. That’s it. Two miles, and you can be done. You know what? It’s wasn’t that bad. Was the wind cold? Yes. But I did it. I started again.
Tomorrow, I will start over again.
Peace from The Edge,
Julia
